little boys

i’ve just started receiving critics for my manuscript from men who are strangers. who are not part of the “sacred sexuality community”, for lack of a better term.

i’m really touched by the longing I hear under their words, specifically when I describe what it feels like, to receive semen inside of me. To conceive. To feel the immediate shifts as the womb and the whole body rearrange themselves to create a child.

Under the “Wait, you can feel that?? is this normal? is this even possible?” there’s their concluding notes, that always allude to Wow - I will never feel this. I’ve never heard details of what it is like. A dreamy note. I hear the little boys in them, watching a mystery out of their reach. So tender. I am happy to bring them that little bit closer to the womb, and to come that little bit closer to them. Start conversations that have not happened before.

old picture from windy summer on our first day of snow here in Berlin. stay warm...

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how to describe